I’ve been an avid media user
my entire life, but social media became a part of me at the age of 12-- the
year I created my Facebook profile. My social media involvement started out
innocent. I would look at my friend’s photos from
our last slumber party that they posted online, make dumb videos with my
friends, and post anything that was on my mind. Sometimes all my status would
say was “Degrassi” (my then all time favorite show,) and that was okay. There
was no pressure. I would have fun with my friends and not care what anyone
thought, because everyone in my middle school was posting the exact same thing.
We were just enjoying ourselves. Our social media pages really were an extension of
us, no masks.
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This past summer I gave up my two
most used forms of social media, Facebook and Instagram. The experience of
having them was not care free anymore, they caused too much unnecessary
pressure and I didn’t want to deal with it. Everyday I would scroll down my
news feed and see pictures of friends, acquaintances or celebrities looking beautiful,
partying or going on great adventures, etc. I would constantly compare myself
to them. Why aren’t I as pretty as that girl? Why aren’t I as fun? Why am I not
as impulsive? I judged myself based on someone’s social media personality, and I
put out my own fake personality to the world. I made sure all my pictures were
posed so I looked “amazing.” Before I went on any fun excursion, I had a photo
planned out to take. And coming up with a caption? Well, that took multiple
people brainstorming for 10-20 minutes. I still remember my best friend giving
me lessons on how to pose for an Instagram photo, so that I would look my
skinniest and prettiest. Social media is like a science, people actually post
instructions on how to get more followers or likes. I knew
exactly how and what kind of pictures to post so I could get a lot of likes. It
all felt fake, but for our generation it’s all that matters.
I couldn’t handle the comparisons
and the low self-worth, so I gave it up. The pressure is off, but sometimes I
do miss it. Sometimes I miss being constantly informed with what my friends and
acquaintances are doing. And I thought by giving up Facebook and Instagram I’d
become less involved with media, but that is not true. I am still as
involved as before, just in a different way. I’m more caught up with current
events, because I fill my time now with the news app, Buzzfeed, podcasts, and
YouTube. And, I still use Snapchat so I can keep in touch with my closest
friends. Now I talk to people about current events, instead of someone’s
instagram feed. Media will always play a big role in my life, but I no longer
use it to put out a false representation of myself. I use it to stay updated and
for entertainment. Not to prove that I’m someone I really am not.
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