Media and Identity

In “Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema,” Laura Mulvey writes that in patriarchal society, women as a whole are seen as a ‘bearer of meaning, not maker of meaning,’ and I am divided over that perspective. There are incredibly influential female-identifying media makers, including visual artists, authors, journalists, directors, filmmakers et cetera, and to say they don’t lend meaning to the media landscape is crass and blatantly incorrect. That said, the dissection of both the female form and the female psyche in society cannot be ignored. A woman’s size, her appearance, and her intelligence are all critiqued mercilessly, bearing a meaning of inferiority.

I am disturbed by this tendency, and feel both lumped into the scrutiny and separated from it simultaneously. I often feel my voice is not important enough to contribute more, while at the same time noting that meaning is up to the beholder. My media making consists of the paintings I’ve made, the photos of vacations that I post, and the poetry I write (way less often than I should), and these are seen by very few people, if any at all. It is not that my media, and by extension me, is meaningless, but in the grand scheme of things, my media and my role in it make no large contribution. Further, I am not famous, and as such, no one picks up a magazine and criticizes my less-than-slender waist, nor does anyone read my research and think any less of it because of my gender. That said, I consume the very same media that does this, and the narrative that comes with it has no doubt been internalized. 

This is not to espouse a woe-is-me stance, but facts are facts. As a media consumer, I am aware that my role comes with internal questions and assumptions. Just as interviewers will ask stars ‘who they are wearing’ before touching on their accomplishments, my mind goes first to complimenting another woman on their physical appearance instead of on their success. In terms of my own identity, this connects to my own insecurities, those of not being thin, not having perfect teeth, not wearing makeup; the list goes on. I of course also have concerns over my direction in life and whether I’ll be successful, but unfortunately, I spend more time scrutinizing over an unflattering angle in a selfie than I do over my honors thesis.

Media is not always so personally damaging, however. In scrolling through memes, I am more focused on the weird humor than on what it is saying about the feminine condition. In watching Amel Kaboul’s TED talk on the global learning crisis, I care more about the facts she presents than the color lipstick she is wearing. I still find personal connection to media, as it is human to establish personal meaning, but it is not always on the basis of my gender identity. For example, with the coverage of school shootings, I do not think of my identity as woman, I think about my future career as a future teacher. While that is a frightening anecdote, it shows that I am more than one element of myself, and the same is true for media. 

I have seen more ‘body positive’ blogs, as well as feminist accounts urging to consider a woman as a whole and not as a part, specifically as a number on a scale. I feel my role in media is mainly that as a spectator, but content such as this photo may inspire me to be more of a contributor.